How to Gain Confidence Through Personal Development


There is no substitute for repetition. In fact, our lives are built on repetition from early adolescent years to adulthood. Repetition builds confidence through consistent assurance. If there is something you lack confidence in, face it head-on repeatedly until it becomes the norm. Most new things in life are scary, uncomfortable, and weird. What happens after the 10th, 12th, or 20th time of doing the one “thing” that was once new?

Point blank, repetition breeds confidence!

From my book Turn Down The Noise

“Kobe Bryant, arguably one of the greatest Professional Basketball players to ever play in the NBA, is known for how he played in games and his work ethic in practice. To become one of the greatest players in NBA history, he’d spend his offseasons making 2,000 shots a day. Not taking, making!

When it came to game time, it looked effortless. His body had engaged in so many repetitions it automatically knew what to do. Most of us look in awe when we see a professional athlete make an amazing play. What people do not realize is some of this is done involuntarily, without even thinking, due to the endless hours of repetition, exercises, drills, or plays the athlete has worked on.”

As we all know, the late great Kobe Bryant exuded confidence on the Basketball court which translated into other areas of his life. As you can see, this came from repetition with something he loved and something that was a part of him. Not sure he would have had the same confidence playing hockey.

Your Foundation

Lack of confidence is sometimes attributed to “chasing the wrong rabbit”. Personal Development is self-mastery which is the understanding of self. In today’s society, it’s easy to get caught chasing the “new shiny object” because we have witnessed others do it and obtain what we are trying to obtain. Here is the thing, we don’t know what these individuals went through to obtain the “thing”, we don’t know what “tools” they had to obtain the “thing”, and we don’t know what their driving force was.

You have to realize that confidence comes when you are doing things you are passionate about, things that are tied to who you are, and doing it in your own way using your own gifts and tools. It’s hard to be confident in something you don’t really care about and it’s hard to gain confidence in something that you are doing just because it’s the cool new “shiny object”.

Ask yourself:

  • What do you need confidence in?

  • Why do you need confidence in it?

  • How important is obtaining confidence to you?

  • How can you take action in a repetitious way to obtain confidence?

  • What is the ultimate result in you obtaining the confidence?

Asking yourself these questions will result in you figuring out if you are “chasing the wrong rabbit”. Here is an example of “chasing the wrong rabbit” or going after the “new shiny object” and losing confidence.

I worked in corporate America and the highest level I obtained in an organization was Director. I was never confident in corporate America and in fact, I started doubting myself as a person the longer I worked in the position. Why? Because it wasn’t who I was. I was only chasing the titles, statuses, and money. In essence, I was “chasing the wrong rabbit” and going after the “new shiny object”.

Now I can say that I am 100% confident in talking about Personal Development and leading large groups of individuals. Why? Because I am doing something tied to me, staying in my lane, and NOT following someone else.


Lastly, it’s important you do not generalize having or not having confidence. You can find the most confident person in the world. I bet you can also find areas that they, the “confident person” are not confident in. Confidence is situational. We label ourselves at times based on one area of our lives and then generalize the label and allow it to cover all the other areas of our lives.

You already have areas you are confident in. Ask yourself why you are confident in these areas as there are some clues to your confidence in the areas you already have it in. As always, you have to know and understand yourself and how you operate first! That’s where Personal Development comes in!


Keeping promises you make to yourself and others helps boost your confidence. Stick to your word!

Check out our 2021 7-Day Personal Growth Challenge


In a nutshell:

  • Repetition is key. Repetition is key. Repetition is key.

  • Make sure you are chasing the right rabbit (something tied to you)

  • Understand confidence is situational and do not generalize it

  • Pick up the clues from the areas in your life that you are already confident in

13 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

2021 © Versatile Success